The Role Change

Lost in the chaos of office, home, family sometimes I feel restless when I desperately feel the need to spend some time alone, me with myself. But are we alone anytime? Physically may be yes but emotionally, of course never because always we go through some emotional turmoil that keeps us worried or at least concerned for some or other thing.

Then with my son beside me taking his good night sleep, I suddenly felt that there was a day when even I was so small, so carefree, so confident which in turn suddenly makes me realize that life is so organized (of course by God and not by us the humans). God has beautifully created the life of humans where we get to play each and every role, go through all kinds of emotions and live all stages of life. In one life, we live so many lives: we take birth and live as an infant who is completely dependent on others, unable to speak but having complete faith on the one who gave birth to us; and gradually year by year we turn independent from being dependent for each and every aspect and we are young, fully energetic and confident to fight the world, passionate and fearless, we take our own decisions; then comes a stage when we get married and get into the world of responsibility, we take decisions for upcoming generations, we plan for the uncertain future; and then again year by year we turn old and turn fully dependent slowly from being independent.

There was a day when I knew nothing and my parents taught me how to express myself, how to talk, how to stand on my feet, how to face the challenges of life and now are the days when I know things that they don’t know, I know better way of doing many things, I am dependable for them; what is very obvious for me is something extraordinary for them. And I know that there will be a day when my son will be much smarter than me and feel the same that I am feeling today.

My parents taught me those dial-up connections and landline phone usage and today I teach them how to use smart phones, WiFi, whats app and then suddenly my mom gets scared because some message pops up or some image does not open and she gives me a call panic stricken and I say chill mom, it’s just an app and it won’t blast, don’t worry I am there.

Truly, everyone is dependent in this inter-dependent world and every age, every stage has its own flavor, charm, grace and beauty and we are all so lucky to live a life full of different flavors.

Mom's Diary contd.....

And here I am, back after a span of, I guess few months; so many blogs to write but not finding time at all because all time goes for my sweetheart.

No matter how much frustrated, stressed or depressed you are, once you see your kid all your pains vanish and where has it vanished you do not know nor you care about it; once you are with them you are all energized up to roam around them. 

You shout, you scream, you play all stupid games, you make faces and what not; with your kid, you too become a kid. You become an improved person because your speed increases manifold; speed at which you eat, do any work and walk increases many times because end of the day you don’t wish to miss even a minute being apart from them. Sometimes you wish to have ten hands or more so that you can finish all the extra jobs fast and then spend the rest of the time with your kid. You no more shop for yourself, you shop for your baby and if some bandwidth is still left you shop for others.

Making your kid eat is a big task (bigger than those deadlines at office) and once you and they are done with it, you feel full even if you are hungry. You see them grow day by day, moment by moment but still when you think how they looked, how they behaved months before, you end up feeling that you don’t remember those exactly which in turn makes you doubtful that whether you have spent time with them or not. 

Day by day they turn smart and naughty and when they pretend to be very innocent although we know that they are not, makes you feel that “OK baby, I know its you” but even you pretend that you did not understand just to make your kid feel that they are smarter than you; all this game of hide and seek is the most lovable thing to cherish.

The moment my son comes running to me as soon as I reach home can seldom be explained. I remember once he was out with his grandfather for quite long time and someone gave him a chocolate; as he came home, he did not see me around and even though he was small, hardly spoke anything but still he called, “MAA” and then I went to him and he showed me his chocolate; I was surprised at his this gesture. Although, these are simple things but still these are special because it’s the mother and kid bonding. 

He was born; he used to sleep all the time, then he turned around, then he crawled, then he walked and now he runs around everywhere, throws things, pours oil can on bed, locks his granny in room, jumps around, imitates everyone around him -  I remember the day he was born with his eyes wandering here and there and I keep wondering whether its him only.

So many feelings, so many emotions, so many expressions but still the love will never change it will always be constant. Kid makes the mother feel so special because end of the day, he needs her and nothing else and this dependability makes motherhood exceptional.

Traffic or Nightmare

So here I am, all frustrated, irritated, stressed, depressed and… why? Because today I spent five hours of my precious day in traffic doing nothing while commuting to office and then way back home. And its not just me but hundreds of other people too who go through this irritation not only today but almost every day.

We are all pissed off; we get ready for office and leave from home like phulka and after travelling for hours in traffic, we finally reach like roasted papad. Then apart from office work  we keep discussing about roads, potholes, government etc; bang our heads and finally go back home via this traffic all over again.

Traffic is becoming worse day by day but then what is the solution to this problem. By just blaming the government and discussing among ourselves solve the problem? Why don’t we do something, isn’t this our city, our country? Are not we responsible for anything? We all are well aware of the fact and have observed it all the time that traffic is because of more number of vehicles; roads are not good but let’s not talk about what is not in our hands; let us try to find out solution for the problems for which we can do something.

Who does not want luxury? We all want to travel in our private vehicle, switching on the AC and radio and riding alone in each car; one person, one car. Why don’t we use public transport when it is readily available? If we are working in normal shifts, then we can easily travel in bus. At least for few days in a week if we use public transport traffic will reduce for sure.

Let us encourage public transport or pooling concept and take one step forward in reducing traffic and stay happy :-). Until and unless we put our city, our country before our own comfort in our priority list, we cannot develop as a country; we can grow individually but not as a society.

Mom's diary.

Blogging has become a dream now, still somehow slowly carrying out the tasks that are imminent from lonnnnn…..g time. Now everything that I want to do has to be appropriately planned; unlike before when I used to plan and carry out in a shot.

What occupies me all the time? What occupies my mind and heart?

I think it’s my shona; shona – the favourite pen name of most of the bong mothers for their kids.

Once the kid enters your life, the life revolves around them; the priority list changes, the thing that had the maximum priority before seems of no importance anymore; the to-do list piles up day by day because someone really special enters your life. Your kid occupies not just your heart and mind but also your desktop background and your mobile wallpaper.

Sometimes I feel that babies are angels in true sense. They really don’t care whether you make them wear costly or cheap dress; they are never bothered whether we use branded or local things for them; they don’t mind for what is their name and title; what they really do care about is how much you love them and how much time you spend with them. With whatever name you call them, if you call them by love, they will surely respond. They understand the language of love and that is all they need. They are not bothered of anything; they do whatever they feel like to do – sing, dance, smile, cry, play; they are so simple and innocent; they are so pure. For them god’s idol or mug or any electronic gadget or any toy - all have the same importance. When they have it, they enjoy it like a valued possession and then leave it and move on. They don’t take much stress for anything; if something is not there then let it be; if they are angry then they cry for few seconds and then they will get distracted for something else. They seem tough to handle but they are so easy going and when we are angry on them, they shower their innocent smile and all the rage gets carried away. I wish we all could be like them.

Once I remember my hubby asked me, "Whether our son knows that I am his father and you are his mother?" and I replied saying that he knows that we are special for him although he does not know the name of this relationship; he cares for our actions and not our names.

Everything about a baby is so cute whether it’s their arrogance or antagonism or love. Howmuchever you adore your baby, it seems you have not adored them at all; howmuchever time you spend with your baby, you want still more time to spend with them; you want to see them, feel them each fraction of a second; you wish to record each and every single moment that you spend with them; you desire to capture their very first of everything – their first word, their first smile, their first step and so many other things.

But of course with all these experiences you also go through an emotional turmoil, you become vulnerable to bad thoughts and get scared that nothing bad should ever happen to my kid. No matter how big a kid grows mother can really seldom stop her from such bad thoughts and kids can never stop themselves from emotional demanding from their mother.

To be continued………………….

IT'S MY CHOICE

Deepika Padukone’s video is the present hot topic that is doing rounds across social media whether it’s facebook, twitter, youtube…. people are sharing their views for it apparently some for it and some against it.  It had such an impact that within hours of the release of that video, another video was posted for the male version of their choice. Of course, no apprehensions, it’s perceptibly one’s own choice of what they want to do keeping a note of not harming or hurting anyone.

What I am unable to understand is why few men are so insecure if a woman has her own choice? I saw many comments in facebook that were saying that Deepika is misguiding the women by telling them the importance of one’s own choice.

What I felt by watching that video is that we, as a woman should not be judged by the surname we put or by the bindi or bangles or mangalsutra we wear or by the figure we carry or by the marital status we have or by the dress we wear. If I am married but don’t put sindoor on my forehead doesn’t mean that I don’t value my relation with my husband; if I wear jeans that does not imply that I don’t have family values;  if I come home late that does not mean that I don’t love my family.

We can’t deny the fact that there exist crimes against women, whether it is molestation or eve-teasing or rape or domestic violence and all are unfortunately committed by men. We cannot generalize men or women on any basis but we can just come forward together to change the society as a whole that has mutual respect for each other.

We should not be judgmental on basis of assumptions; rather we should esteem the other’s point of view. After all, we must remember that we are all human beings before being a male or a female and we have our life to live so each of us as an individual can have his or her own choice to lead the life the way we want.

For those who have not seen this video, here is the link:

http://www.mensxp.com/special-features/today/25490-this-powerful-video-starring-deepika-padukone-will-change-the-way-you-look-at-women.html